Over the weekend, our esteemed founder Blogust and I had our bajillionth discussion regarding the existence of extraterrestrial life. He misguidedly believes that there are no such things as flying saucers and little green men, because he is a moron (no offense, Blogust). Well, prepare to feel like a dumbass, because none other than the chosen one himself, Barack Hussein Obama, is about to spill the beans about our Martian benefactors. In your face, Blogust! Pwned!
The long and short of the article is that Obama is supposed to make some sort of offhand remark regarding alien contact in the next month or so that is to going to touch off a two to three year plan to divulge the truth about Earth contact with alien civilizations over the last 60 years.
Also, the aliens are going to clean up our atmosphere for us, which is pretty sweet. Sure, they're probably going to insist on enslaving most of the human race (the Dems will call it job creation) and wiping out the rest of us in return, but it's a small price to pay to be rid of the threat of Garotzuva if you ask me. I'm going to go home and fire some aerosol cans into the atmosphere to celebrate!