Bad News, Amigos.

The Walking Dead producer Frank Darabont (he of the one dimensional right wing nutjob stock hillybilly character) has hired the first member of his new writing staff. The guy he hired was a former producer and writer for The Shield and Hawthorne. A lot of people liked The Shield, but I don't know much about it other than it dealt with police corruption and it aired on FX, so it probably contained an uncomfortable amount of softcore pornography. Softcore pornography is lame (Am I supposed to jerk off to your cable drama? I'm confused.). Hawthorne is some cable medical drama starring Will Smith's wife, so I'm going to go ahead and assume it's full of good ole fashioned Hollywood sensibilities. This dude working on those two shows isn't what worries me, though. What worries me is that he was also a writer and producer of Crash, the pay cable spin-off of the greatest white guilt feature film ever made. I've never been so certain there will be a George Bush zombie and that at some point the Walking Dead survivors will come across a valiant black politician survivor who will give his life to save them all. And at some point Rick is sure to denounce his former life as a police officer. Oh, and can we expect to see more kindhearted Mexican gang members? Count on it! Did Global Warming bring the zombie apocalypse? Do you even need to ask?